Sparkling Vintage Fiction. Among other things.

What’s So Great About Gloves?

My first memory of white gloves involves wearing them to church. It was an Easter Sunday when I was three or four years old. I was all spiffed out in a new outfit–a robin’s egg blue coat, as I recall, and a hat to match, with an elastic band that went under my chin to keep it on my head. The final touch was a pair of white cotton gloves. We must have been running late that morning, because my hapless older brother was assigned the herculean task of putting the gloves on my hands during the car ride to church.

Well.To hear him tell the tale, getting the gloves onto my hands was akin to stuffing a live squid into a tube. Or maybe ten live squids, one for each finger. All I know is, by the time we got to church, dire threats were being uttered lest I should dare to remove the gloves from my hands before lunchtime. I did not dare. Unfortunately, all of us children were given special treats that day during Sunday school. Chocolate treats, of the kind that melts both in your mouth AND in your hands. White gloves plus melted chocolate equaled one hot mess. But let the record show that I kept my promise not to remove my gloves.

That incident spelled the end of my white-glove-wearing days until a few years ago, when I found a sweet pair of vintage white cotton gloves in an antique store. I had to have them, and then, naturally, I had to wear them. So I did, on an Easter Sunday, to church (no chocolate in sight, alas). I received a few comments, but one really stuck out to me: “I love your gloves! I wish I were brave enough to wear something like that.”

Now, honestly. “Brave” are soldiers fighting for our country. “Brave” are first responders rescuing people from burning buildings. When “brave” gets applied to wearing a couple of pieces of flimsy cotton on one’s hands, it seems that we’re setting the bar rather low, don’t you think?

While I don’t consider myself “brave” for wearing gloves, I do love them. Look at all the things they’re good for!

Gloves keep your hands clean. In a germ-conscious age, instead of slathering antibacterial lotion on your hands every five minutes, why not cover your them with gloves and then toss the gloves in the washer at the end of the day?

Gloves make a handshake more comfortable. No more clammy-hand concerns. Yours or theirs.

Gloves look elegant. Think Jackie O. and Grace Kelly (above). Gloves add an elegant touch to any nice outfit.

Just steer clear of the chocolate.

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